I have finally finished the self-examination writing assignments I set myself early on in the life of my blog. As I go through my awakening this year, God is answering one of my longest standing prayers, tell me who He says I am. I am going to start here with this summary of what I have learned about myself. My faith, my beliefs, are a way bigger part of my life than I realized they were. They are, quite amazingly, just as big, if not bigger a part of my life than I hoped that they could one day be. I am a quick learner in some aspects, but when it comes to things like this I am just slow, as my wife lovingly pointed out the other day.
When I started this blog I declared that this would not be about my faith although it would surely influence some things I put on here. Let me correct that, this blog is about me, it is a place for my thoughts, feelings & emotions to be expressed, this blog is a place for the overflow of my heart. My faith is who I am, it is what I am, starting to write about that has been so incredibly freeing and not to be rejected for doing so has been wonderfully reassuring.
Now, I want to clarify a point I have made previously, I do not believe in any way that it is right for me to force my beliefs on anybody else. I believe that we all have to find out own path, our own beliefs & faiths, whether that be Jesus, Allah, science or whatever. It is not my place to tell you that your beliefs are wrong. However, it is my responsibility & my calling, not to hide who I am, it is my responsibility to share all the good that has happened to me. Not to “convert” anybody, but to let people know that it is available to them, if that is what they choose.
Other things I have discovered through these writings & this year in general? I am way less interested in sport & video games than I used to be. I still enjoy them, but I would much rather spend time writing & reading. Sports in particular has been such a huge part of my life for the last 25 years, but today, while I still love the competition aspect, the soap-opera that goes along with it is growing increasingly tiresome to me.
My love of creating music has been sorely neglected for far too long, I am enjoying getting that going again, there should be some blog entries on that soon.
The biggest thing I have discovered through these writings & my blog in general? It’s ok to be me, it is ok that I am a gentle poetic soul who is spiritually sensitive. It is ok to admit that I am still far from perfect, but I am at least a work in progress. I know from experience that when you share things they begin to heal, that is why I write, whether it be poetry or anything else, not just for my own healing, but in the hope that someone who needs to see what I have written, to not feel alone, can find a message. This blog is making a world of difference in my life, if it can make a small difference in your life, even if it is just 2 minutes of enjoying a poem, that validates any & every effort I put into this.
Here’s to the future, whatever it may hold. In this dark world, may our lights shine bright to remind people that good will always outnumber & outmatch evil.