Identity, it is what defines us. It is what we believe in our heart of hearts to be true about ourselves. Our decisions, our reactions, our behaviors all come in some from our core identity. If you ask someone to describe or define who they are they will generally come up with a list, a list of things that are important to them, what they believe and what they like to do. How often though do we go beyond the list, to really understand what it is about these things that make us who we are?
I have made reference several times recently, here & in other places, that it is time to find out who the heck I really am. That might seem like a strange statement for someone who is close to 36 & from the world’s perspective is doing ok. The thing is, for much of my life my identity has been based on absolute lies from the pit of hell, lies that I believed in my heart of hearts to be true. Lies about God, lies about me & lies about the world around me.
I have been set free from those lies & healed. Yet, without those lies I am left to discover who I really am, what do I really believe, what is really important to me, what is my real place in this world? This hasn’t been and won’t be, I expect, a sudden ah-ha moment, but more a gradual process of discovery, discipline and growth.
I am going to attempt to make an initial list and then between my poetic ramblings, self appointed writing assignments and my other thoughts I am going to investigate each of these. Hopefully to help me get a better idea of who I really am. It may sound confusing but it makes sense to me. I am still the same person I have always been, but what part of the person I used to be are really me & what parts were just aspects of the masks that I wore as part of the coping mechanisms I was forced to develop?
So who am I? I am a Christian, a family man, a music lover, a sports nut, a friend, a gamer, a freight jedi and I’m sure several other things that will come to me later. These seem like good places to start though, what do I believe, feel & like about each of these headings, why do I feel the way I do, what do I want to do with them in my life & how can I be the best me in all of these?